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Infatuation
2 min read · 353 words
Infatuation is the reward system running at maximum output toward a specific target — usually another operator — based on an incomplete model the mind has constructed.
The hardware produces this signal when the attraction circuitry, the novelty response, and the social bonding system converge on a single target. The chemistry is intense: dopamine flooding, obsessive thinking, idealization of the target, reduced activity in the brain’s critical assessment regions. The organism under infatuation is running a reward protocol so powerful that it resembles substance-related activation.
The incomplete model is the defining feature. The system has not gathered sufficient data about the target to build an accurate representation. What it has gathered — the available surface data, the early interactions, the projected qualities — has been assembled into an idealized model that the mind then treats as the person. The actual person is substantially more complex, more flawed, and more ordinary than the model suggests. The system doesn’t know this because the infatuation chemistry is actively suppressing the critical assessment function.
This is not malfunction. The hardware was designed to produce intense bonding motivation toward potential mates — the organisms that paired more intensely reproduced more. The infatuation signal exists to overcome the rational assessment that might prevent pair-bonding, because pair-bonding serves the organism’s reproductive agenda regardless of the rational assessment.
The signal dissipates. The chemistry is not designed to sustain itself indefinitely — the intense phase runs for months, not years, as the system gradually restores the critical assessment function and the model updates with real data. What remains after infatuation resolves determines whether the connection has substance: the Attachment entry’s wiring, the Connection entry’s sustained exchange, or nothing — the model having dissolved when the chemistry could no longer sustain it.
The operator’s position during infatuation: enjoy the chemistry while recognizing what it is. The signal is real. The model it’s based on is not. Major decisions (relocation, financial commitment, life restructuring) made during the infatuation phase are decisions made by the reward system, not by the one at the controls.